So I quit smoking a month-ish ago and joined the gym too. I think I may have explained this before and if I did…please bear with me as I explain again…I don’t do resolutions. I actually used to make goals on my birthday – August 23 – because it’s a new year for me…but last year there was entirely too much drama in my life for me to even think about goals. So I was like ehh…it’s the beginning of a new year and maybe I should do something because I didn’t do anything on my birthday now that all the madness has died down some so I made a bunch of piddly little goals to tide me over until my birthday…but I did make one major goal and quitting smoking was it. My mind thinks like this though…if you take a really bad habit and replace it with a really good one…then you’re a step ahead. So I joined a gym in tandem with quitting smoking. I figured it was cold here and even though I have a pretty pricy elliptical in my house and a bunch of exercise DVD’s and things like that to have a home gym along with a really hilly ‘hood, the gym would be a good way for me to get out of the house and maybe make one new friend (which was on my list of goals because I feel so socially isolated sometimes even though I do have a lot of friends and acquaintances…again a story for another day).
So anyway…I got 3 free sessions with the personal trainer who was just amazing and I adored her. She worked me hard but not so hard that I thought holy hell I might just die. She understood that my ankle was reconstructed twice, that I’m still having some issues with the crotch hernia that was repaired in 2012, and saw that I pushed myself but also knew that I respected my body enough to know when enough was enough. I didn’t stop doing what she told me to do, but there were a couple of things we did have to modify based on how I felt that day and she was cool with that. So anyway…today was our last session and I saw good results. So I signed up for a whole year contract of one session a week with her. Do I have buyer’s remorse? Kind of. I mean maybe I should’ve thought it through instead of doing it then and there because it was a little expensive (about half the cost of what I’ll save on cigarettes each month), but at the same time…I will be at the gym so why not pay someone to help me work out the areas that I know need work and set up a solid training plan minus my running and half-ass weight and full-ass ab routine….someone that I enjoy working with and someone that I feel does push me but not to the extreme like the first trainer I ever used did (the one that caused the crotch hernia in the first place). Should I feel bad? Is it like going to a car dealer and buying the car you fell in love with right then and there or is it a good thing? Is the fact I’m asking my adorable random readers a bad sign or just me feeling bad because I could’ve used that money to say…feed starving animals at shelters? I feel this way when I buy anything for myself except when I bought cigarettes. They were my one thing that gave me no guilt. Everything else I buy does unless my mood is wonky and I make the conscious choice to go on a spree (then everything gets taken back a day or two later). I don’t want to feel guilty for making my health a priority, but maybe I crossed a line.
PS – I do have 3 days to cancel.
What do you think I should do? Do any of you feel this way when you buy something? If you have any stories of remorse, please tell them.